Things I Don't Want To Be . . .

1. I don't want to be mean.
I've come to realize over the years that I have a serious face. Corners of the mouth turned down. Squinty, cloudy eyes that seem to be devoid of expression. I once had a boss who asked me why I was scowling. I didn't know I was scowling. In fact, inside I was feeling quite cheerful. However, being a contemplative, detail-oriented person (with a little obsessive-compulsiveness thrown in), I often forget that my face has slipped into neutral. Gotta work on that.

Movie cowboys used to say that an ornery person was "meaner than a rattlesnake." I guess that meant that the person (or snake) was ready to strike out at you for no apparent reason. Mean people appear to be absent of feeling, but inside they are just miserable. Beneath the bad behavior is a child of God who desperately needs love. Some have become so hardened that they reject any measure of kindness. But love is the most powerful force on our planet. Never underestimate it. And never, ever return meanness with a bigger helping of the same.

2. I don't want to be someone I am not.
"What you see is what you get." That line is used by folks who think that they are like that, but are very rarely anywhere near it. You see, our natural tendency is to adjust our behavior to favor someone we want to impress. We act attentive, complimentary, disturbed, angry, tough, bored, caring, empathetic, sympathetic, etc. --- with the purpose only to redirect the attention back to our own selves. Oh sure, we SAY we don't. And many times we may not even want to. But looking back afterwards, we are disappointed to realize that we did. God wants us to be who we are. He takes us as we are. Then, if we will let him, he will shape our character to a true level of openness and honesty that brings out the genuine best in others, as well as in ourselves.

3. I don't want to be a liar.
Putting aside the question, "Is it ever OK to lie?," (i.e., Rahab and the spies), liars are difficult people to live with. They receive the label by telling a few whopping lies, or by offering up a steady stream of untruths. Professional liars can even reach a point to where they can't separate truth from falsehood. The real danger here is that trust is violated. And trust is very difficult to restore once it has been crippled. Jesus said to let your "no" be "no" and your "yes" be "yes". "Anything beyond this comes from the evil one," he warned. And women, please, PLEASE, do not torment your men with questions like, "Honey, does this outfit make me look fat?" We're trying to do better, but there's no safe answer for those kind.

More to come. Stay tuned.
STEVE